Help writing a dating profile
I keep waiting for the red squiggly line to appear under it) and I’m like, uhhhh, no, let’s go see a NORMAL movie, and you’re like but I thought you said you like movies, and I’m like yeah but not THAT kind. It’s just gonna make me think you’re a pretentious prick with a prick the size of a cocktail weenie. And while we’re on the subject, don’t post a picture of yourself with your cat. Embrace your body, look self-confident, and they will come. I think if this jackass is in too much of a hurry to type two extra letters, maybe he does EVERYTHING too quickly.
So anyways, instead of writing stuff like I love walking on the beach and going on vacations and seeing movies, try something more specific like I like subtitled films that are boring as shit, walking on nude beaches and visiting huts in Africa that don’t have TVs. If you’re a woman, you’ll look like a crazy cat lady. Or if you’re not ready for that, just photoshop your head onto Halle Berry’s body and post that shit. Sure, you can use a selfie, (and read this part carefully) AS LONG AS NO ONE CAN TELL IT’S A SELFIE.
Until I did that whole online dating thing and met my totally awesome, badass, studmuffin hubby there.
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